Maher to Dear Leader: Game Over
A Maher Proposal
Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you any more. There's no more money to spend - you used up all of that. You can't start another war because you used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people. Listen to your Mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit card's maxed out. No one's speaking to you. Mission accomplished.
Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away, like you did with your military service and the oil company and the baseball team. It's time, time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or space man?
Now I know what you're saying: there're so many other things that you as President could involve yourself in. Please don't. I know, I know, there's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela, eliminating the sales tax on yachts, turning the space program over to the church and Social Security to Fannie Mae, and giving embryos the vote.
But, sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised that you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes.
On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two trade centers, a piece of the Pentagon, and the city of New Orleans. Maybe you're just not lucky. I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side.
So, yes, God does speak to you. What he's saying is: 'Take a hint.'
tags: impeach bush george bush bill maher
hat tip: Judy at Billionaires for Bush
Very well said.
Poor George...
Posted by: qrswave | December 19, 2005 at 10:25 AM
You're a catastrophe that walks like a man. Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire city to rising water and snakes.
"...catastrophe that walks like a man."
Bwahhahahaha! Maher can be a class A dick sometimes, but then he reminds you of why we watched Politically Incorrect for all thos years (when it was on cable, that is.)
Posted by: Kvatch | December 19, 2005 at 12:36 PM
Amen on that Bro! M
Posted by: mandt | December 19, 2005 at 04:11 PM
Brilliant and funny as hell - as usual.
Posted by: HelenWheels | December 19, 2005 at 04:34 PM
"Helping poor people?" ol' yuck!
Posted by: Missouri Mule | December 20, 2005 at 01:03 AM
What he's saying is: 'Take a hint.'
This man-child isn't capable of "taking a hint'. He isn't. And the nation is all the poorer for it.
Christ would be ashamed of him...
Posted by: D. | December 20, 2005 at 04:02 AM
Does anyone else think that maybe the GOP infects its presidents with Alzheimers Disease so that they just get worse as time goes on?
Posted by: PusBoy | December 20, 2005 at 05:01 AM
yo, my local rep, listen up. it won't change nuthin'. you won't be savin' democracy or any shaded asses anywhere else in the whole world. i suggest, just for the fun of it, and for no other good reason than that we can just go ahead and do it, that we impeach AND remove, because he won't have the good grace, as did nixon, to simply resign.
Posted by: rob miller | December 21, 2005 at 06:30 PM
oh, and when he's good and real gone, no matter who runs the show, we will still be in iraq.
Posted by: rob miller | December 21, 2005 at 06:32 PM
It's Christmas morning, the tree is lit, and here I stumble upon Bill Maher's piece. I like this Christmas present best of all!
Posted by: Luke | December 25, 2005 at 11:03 AM
Hmmm... Maher's trying to end his career here? Or is he a Cheney mole?
Posted by: half-vast conspirator | December 26, 2005 at 08:40 PM