Will Somebody Please Strangle Larry Miller
If you live in the greater Los Angeles area then you will know who Larry Miller is. He is the president of Sit and Sleep (Your Mattress Superstore) and one of the most annoying bastards to hit television and radio commercials since Carrot Top hawked 1-800-CALL ATT. He yells this following tag line in a high-pitched lisp-ridden voice:
We'll beat anyone's advertising price or your mattress is FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!
Now . . . The Return of Thor!
I Heart GITMO?
What would possess someone to wear an I Heart GITMO t-shirt? Who would purchase an orange "Club Gitmo" polo shirt from the EIB (Excellence in Butt-Fucking) store? I guess there are plenty of mindless ditto-heads who would gladly fork out money for the latest jingoistic fad that their leader is selling. Well, poor Rush has to find some way to support his hillbilly heroin habit. In his latest cartoon The Oppression Collection, Ted Rall points out which prison camps the Republican cloth-makers have left out. I could just imagine Michelle Malkin going bananas over the "I Heart Manzanar" t-shirt.
Republicans Demand Exit Strategy (Six Years Ago)
George W. Bush in 1999: “Victory means exit strategy, and it’s important for the President to explain to us what the exit strategy is.” But when you become president it's a whole different story. Even though you stated you were against nation building in the 2000 campaign, now you don't have to give timetables or exit strategies on your own imperial nation building exericse in Iraq. John at Blogenlust has many more examples of this Republican hypocrisy.
Doritos For The Dictator
While U.S. prison guards were torturing detainees at Abu Ghraib, Saddam Hussein was livin' it up in his cell munching on Doritos and chatting with his guards. What are the implications of Saddam's support for FritoLay snack products? Guy at Low Culture unleashed some faux outrage on PepsiCo (which owns FritoLay) about the treasonous implications of Saddam's support for American snack food. You must read the email response he got from PepsiCo.
British Nostalgia for Empire
Before the United States assumed the role of global hegemon after World War II, the British Empire was the world's major superpower for at least two centuries. On June 28 the British commemorated the 200th anniversary of the Battle of Trafalgar when the British navy defeated Napoleon's French and Spanish forces. Ships re-enacted the battle Tuesday with fusillades of gunfire, blasts from cannons and fireworks in an attempt to remind the world that they used to be important. That makes me wonder . . . when the American Empire eventually falls, what battle will we commemorate to celebrate our once famed grandiosity?
Today in History
1651 - The Battle of Beresteczko ends with a Polish victory over Ukraine. Wow, I can't believe the Polish actually won a war.
1936 - Margaret Mitchell's Gone with the Wind is published. The novel described the difficulties of slave ownership and how whites were tragically forced to relinquish their ownership of African American chattel. If you ask me, I prefer The Wind Done Gone, which looks at this whole scenario from a slave's point of view.
1966 - Happy Birthday to ear-chomper Mike Tyson, who turns 39 years old today.
2002 - Brazil won their fifth title in the World Cup defeating Germany 2-0 in Yokohama, Japan. I remember watching that game at 2 a.m. (due to the time difference between California and Japan). I'm hoping for a sixth win next year. Ronaldo better stay with the team through 2006 dammit!
I was so happy when they "retired" Irwin the accountant. He's much more annoying than Larry in my opinion.
You're KILLING ME, Larry!!!!!!!!!
I wince every time I hear it.
Posted by: The Chemist | June 30, 2005 at 08:56 PM