The Gambler

Mrs. Prop really enjoys playing the lottery. I personally despise any form of gambling whether it's high stakes horse races or a simple $5 "Quick Pick" in the Super Lotto. When she asks me to buy a lotto ticket I usually respond with "You know that you have a better chance of being struck by lighting than winning the lottery." Last week this conversation ended with me going out to buy a ticket. The truth is that Mrs. Prop will have the last laugh if and when we actually win the damned lottery (probability highly unlikely). 

These days, when I think about gambling, Kenny Rogers comes to mind. Living in Southern California we are inundated by radio and television ads for Barona Resort & Casino. Apparently Kenny Rogers got bored at running his chicken restaurants so he sold the chain to Nathan's and now he pimps for a casino in the San Diego area. Although the casino is located on Native American land and run by the Barona tribe, Kenny Rogers is the white face to lure gullible white people into the casino. It's a place with "the luckiest slots" that caters to "real players", as opposed to the fake ones. Hmm, do "real players" have to dress like Kenny Rogers?

   

I just dropped in to see what condition my condition was in.

Why would I want to waste my hard-earned money by throwing it away in a slot machine or shamefully abdicating it to a seedy poker dealer? Maybe I just don't get it. Both my Dad and his sister love gambling. In fact they go to Barona regularly. They also go to Vegas about four times a year. I don't understand the thrill and excitement of giving one's money away to a huge corporation for nothing in return but humiliation. I have better things to do with my time, like catching up on my reading or photo-shopping pictures of the pope and the president.

Although I find most country music to be extraordinarily lame and cheesy, there's something cool and even suave about Kenny Rogers. Maybe it's the late 1800s-era outfit he's wearing. Or maybe it's Will Sasso's impersonation of Kenny Rogers which I truly dig. Check out Kenny Rogers Jackass where contestants are forced to gulp rotten milk while Kenny downs a bottle of Jack Daniels.

Don't be a jackass. Don't gamble.

Comments

[EEK]

Those casino ads always make me laugh. I live in Tulsa, and we are surrounded by different indian casinos. They all make it sound like good times are just around the corner, come get rich quicker....

If I want to be entertained, i can spend money at mr pussy's liquor store and know what i'm getting...

[el s]

http://www.menwholooklikekennyrogers.com/

[Agi T. Prop]

I didn't realize Kenny was so popular with the middle-aged male crowd.

[mandt]

Hey! Country Western is the liturgucal music of disfunctional families and co-dependent, whiney women. lol M

[tina]

".... see what condition my condition was in."

Fabulous reference to The Big Lebowski... one of the best movies EVER. My hubby and I never realized how often we use lines from the film until just recently, hubby dropped something on the floor and he muttered "Jesus" to which our just turned 3 yr old daughter says w/out missing a beat "You said it man." I guess she has paid very close attention to me saying that to hubby every time he says Jesus, eh?

[Agi T. Prop]

Nobody fucks with the Jesus.

[Pepper]

Mr. Pussy's liquor store? Holy cow, Tulsa is a crazy place.

Anyone see the 'Reno 911!' episode in which the cops must protect Kenny's person when he attends a book signing? Priceless.

[mandt]

"Mr. Pussy's liquor store? Holy cow, Tulsa is a crazy place." ditto S.F back in the olden days Magnolia Thunder Pussy was the best stoned ice cream in town--Buds I think. M