agitprop version 2.0

Tom Delay Indicted!

Sweet Jebus I can't believe my eyes! The locusts are coming and seas are turning red. Take cover. I'm raising the Rapture Alert level!

                                              

Houston Chronicle:

A Travis County grand jury today indicted U.S. House Majority Leader Tom DeLay of Sugar Land on a single count of felony criminal conspiracy involving an exchange of money that made corporate cash available to Republican Texas House candidates in 2002. The indictment alleges that DeLay conspired with two of his political associates, John Colyandro of Austin and Jim Ellis of Virginia, to convert $190,000 in corporate money into individual campaign contributions through a transfer of funds using the Republican National Committee.

DeLay's Statement:

I have notified the speaker that I will temporarily step aside from my position as majority leader pursuant to rules of the House Republican Conference and the actions of the Travis County district attorney today." — House Majority Leader Tom DeLay, R-Texas.

You'll be able to find The Hammer getting hammered at a local D.C. Saloon. Oh you didn't know? He looooves the sauce. Here's video proof of Hot Tub Tom (a.k.a. Drunkie McPuke Shoes) drunk off his ass at a June Republican fund-raiser.

Fun With Google

Simple pleasures for a Sunday afternoon . . .

1. Go to www.Google.com
2. Type in "failure" without the quotation marks
3. Press the "I'm Feeling Lucky" button (instead of the google search button)
4. Laugh
5. Repost

Hurry, before the good folks at Google "fix" this.

Pledge of Allegiance

Wingnuts, freepers and other American Idiots have their panties in a knot over U.S. District Judge Lawrence Karlton's decision to declare "under God" as unconstitutional. Can we expect Pat Robertson and the other members of the American Taliban to issue fatwas for the head of Activist Judge Karlton? Hell yes! Torture General Alberto Gonzales has publicly pledged to fight this ruling.

The Culture Ghost gleefully enjoys the furious right-wing reaction to this ruling. John C reminds us that the words "under God" were inserted in the pledge during the 1950's, that nostalgic era of kept housewives, racial segregation and anti-communist fervor.

Personally, I could give a damn whether or not the words "under God" are in the pledge of allegiance. The pledge is merely a mindless Pavlovian exercise for children who don't even know what words they are reciting at eight o'clock every morning. In my schooling experience the pledge was always followed by prayers and intercessions (I went to Catholic school).

Here's Jello Biafra's take on the pledge, from his spoken word album I Blow Minds For A Living:

I pledge defiance to the flag
Of the United Snakes of Captivity
And to the Republic for which it stands,
I dip it in kerosene, and stick it up the ass of you know who and light it
One nation, under God--or else
One nation, under psychopathic Pentagon gangsters,
Whose idea of national security is concentration camps
For people who dare to use the drugs
That the CIA brings in and the government supplies themselves

One nation, under Wall Street:
If the cops and the government are all criminals,
I might as well be one too!
One Nation of sedated tabloid robots
Who actually believe what they see on tv, even on MTV!
But when asked they reply “I don’t care”

One nation, drowning in its own garbage
Indivisible from the fall of Rome
With liberty and justice for all (who can afford it)

Burn, Baby, Burn...

At which Jello goes on to talk about flag-burning.

pledge of allegiance

Scandals of Yore

Scandals come and go in American politics faster than new big network sitcoms in September. Whereas network sitcoms stink, American political scandals are both intriguing and maddening. Now that Congress is back from recess and the Supreme Court will soon be starting up a new term, I've been reflecting on some salacious scandalous scumbags from earlier this year.

scan·dal  n.

1. A publicized incident that brings about disgrace or offends the moral sensibilities of society: a drug scandal that forced the mayor's resignation.
2. A person, thing, or circumstance that causes or ought to cause disgrace or outrage: a politician whose dishonesty is a scandal; considered the housing shortage a scandal.
3. Damage to reputation or character caused by public disclosure of immoral or grossly improper behavior; disgrace.
4. Talk that is damaging to one's character; malicious gossip.

Back in March and April of this year the left blogosphere was jumping for joy at the thought of Tom DeLay getting booted out of office on corruption charges. I even got in on the action. So much for that wish. Hot Tub Tom proved to be much tougher than we thought. I know that DeLay's campaign associates were indicted last week but I have a feeling that the only chance of removing him will be during the 2006 election. If the DNC wants to play hardball then they should do to DeLay what the RNC did to Daschle in 2004. A coordinated national effort to fund a challenger and destroy a party leader might prove to be fruitful. Or maybe that would just be wasting time on revenge. In the meantime, enjoy this video clip of DeLay drunk off his ass at his birthday in June 2005.

What about Jimmy Jeff Gannon Gueckert? A fake reporter gets fake press credentials to ask fake questions to a fake administration . . . and he and his "employers" get away with it? He played Fred Garvin with Scottie the Sucker MC who in turn gave him access to the White House. Why wasn't Gannon investigated? Could he be involved in the Plame leak? And what about that other media whore, Armstrong Williams? He got $250,000 of our tax dollars to pimp No Child Left Behind and all I got was a lame Fox News show imitation.

That brings me to our final scandal generator of 2005, Puppet-master Rove, an odd Texan combination of Josef Goebbels and Niccolo Machiavelli. Come on Fitzgerald, get cracking with those indictments! Like the old saying goes, power corrupts--and absolute power corrupts absolutely. So why do Republicans continue to grant Bush and his junta absolute power? I'll never understand it, especially from the party of limited government.

Get ready for an intriguing and maddening fall season of political scandal.

Bush Meets Brownie

thanks to mandt for inspiration

get yer poo flags on!

Horse With No Name

The charges: criminal negligence, incompetence and forgery.

FEMA director Michael "Brownie" Brown is not only aloof and incompetent but he is also a liar. Time Magazine reports that Brownie's resume contains several embellishments to put it lightly:

Before joining FEMA, his only previous stint in emergency management, according to his bio posted on FEMA's website, was "serving as an assistant city manager with emergency services oversight." The White House press release from 2001 stated that Brown worked for the city of Edmond, Okla., from 1975 to 1978 "overseeing the emergency services division." In fact, according to Claudia Deakins, head of public relations for the city of Edmond, Brown was an "assistant to the city manager" from 1977 to 1980, not a manager himself, and had no authority over other employees. "The assistant is more like an intern," she told TIME. "Department heads did not report to him." Brown did do a good job at his humble position, however, according to his boss.

Not only does he fail to mention his three-year gig at the International Arabian Horse Association (from which he was fired) but he claims to have experience in disaster and emergency management. Well, at least he's good at making creative resumes:

Brown's lack of experience in emergency management isn't the only apparent bit of padding on his resume, which raises questions about how rigorously the White House vetted him before putting him in charge of FEMA. Under the "honors and awards" section of his profile at FindLaw.com — which is information on the legal website provided by lawyers or their offices—he lists "Outstanding Political Science Professor, Central State University". However, Brown "wasn't a professor here, he was only a student here," says Charles Johnson, News Bureau Director in the University Relations office at the University of Central Oklahoma (formerly named Central State University). "He may have been an adjunct instructor," says Johnson, but that title is very different from that of "professor."

I'm actually surprised that the media is going after him so vociferously. Brownie's position is cronyism at its most despicable incarnation. He got the job as head of FEMA because he was a college roommate of Joe Allbaugh, President Bush's 2000 campaign manager.

The Bush regime has transformed the United States into a third world country in which the president's childhood friends and cousins are awarded cabinet positions on the basis of pure nepotism alone. I wouldn't mind if Brownie actually knew something about emergency management, but his actions over the past ten days have proved otherwise.

hurricane katrina katrina michael brown

America, Circa 2005

          

Who's the one getting f*%ked over again?    

Faith-Based Disaster Relief

Hulkaleezza to the rescue:

BAYOU LA BATRE - After fending off criticism that help came too slowly for Hurricane Katrina's black victims, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice nodded in agreement Sunday to a call for patience.

"Wait for the Lord," the Rev. Malone Smith Jr. told Rice and the rest of the Pilgrim Rest AME Zion congregation outside Mobile.

"There are some things the president can do; there are some things the government can do," Smith told about 300 worshippers. "But God can do all things. I want you to know he's never late. He's always on time."

Rice, the Bush administration's chief defender against charges that the government's sluggish response showed racial insensitivity, later echoed the call for patience.

"The Lord is going to come on time, if we just wait," she said.

Be patient you whiny petulant children. All you do is complain!

"Waaahh, we lost our house in the hurricane. We had no food or water for a week. No one helped us, not even the government. Waaahh!!"

Be patient and the Lord will come to your rescue (that is if you pray correctly).

Condi's damage control mission simply gives credence to Kanye West's outburst last Friday. If I may I'd like to revise Mr. West's statment . . . George Bush doesn't care about poor black people or ones that aren't in his administration. Actually, George Bush doesn't care about anyone but his corporate donors.

This also speaks volumes about the Republican attitude toward government. Starve it until it drowns in a bathtub. Then, simply tell citizens that they must be patient and wait for God's help.

hat tip: watertiger

hurricane katrina katrina politics michael brown kanye west

Gay Marriage in California?

"All of a sudden, we see riots, we see protests, we see people clashing. The next thing we know, there is injured or there is dead people. We don't want to get to that extent." — Governor Schwarzenegger in Feb. 2004, on the dangers posed by gay marriage

My colleagues in left blogistan have expressed hope over the possibility of California becoming the first state in the nation to legalize gay marriage via the legislature. The kicker is that Governor Schwarzenegger has to sign the bill. Based on his statements above, he'll most likely veto the bill since gay marriage would trigger a global apocalypse.

Political Wire reports that Arnold might not be back in 2006:

Just one in three voters would re-elect California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger (R) if he runs for a second term, a new Field Poll shows. In addition, trial heats between him and potential challengers Phil Angelides (D) and Steve Westly (D) would be too close to call if they were held now.

The San Francisco Chronicle says the poll "illustrates how the Republican governor's once-diverse base of support -- independents, Democrats and Republicans who gave him a victory in the unprecedented 2003 recall election -- has now shrunk almost exclusively to his GOP base."

One must not underestimate the power of the Gropenfuhrer. Unless a big name candidate runs against him next year, we might be stuck with him another four years. Does anyone here in California know who the hell Angelides or Westly are? I didn't think so.

If Schwarzenegger signs the gay marriage bill, then the right-wing of the Republican party will certainly abandon him in 2006. My humble prediction is that Arnold vetoes the bill and wins re-election next year off name recognition alone. Why? Because evil always wins.

The political goals of Arnold 2006:

To crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentation of their women (and the gays)!

Katrina, One Week Later

The chaos caused by Hurricane Katrina and the lack of federal response to the disaster has led to some interesting discourse as well as some strange politicking.  I'd like to give a quick wrap-up to some of these items.

Look what the Queen Mum had to say about hurricane victims who are finding refuge in Houston. Babs thinks that poor black people are not only scary but they are also opportunistic:

"What I’m hearing which is sort of scary is they all want to stay in Texas. Everyone is so overwhelmed by the hospitality . . . And so many of the people in the arena here, you know, were underprivileged anyway, so this--this (she chuckles slightly) is working very well for them." 

I think it's fair to call George W. Bush a son of a bitch. Norm has the audio @ onegoodmove. Maybe we can ship both Babs and Pat Robertson off to the funny farm now?

I previously mentioned that according to the media, black people loot while white people borrow. Well, it appears that cops borrow as well. Check out this footage of cops borrowing merchandise at Wal-Mart.

Bill Clinton spoke out today on CNN about the lack of federal response to aid hurricane victims:

"Our government failed those people in the beginning, and I take it now there is no dispute about it," Clinton told CNN. "One hundred percent of the people recognize that -- that it was a failure." We've got the departments on the ground, we've got the military on the ground, we've got a chance to do it right now, and we should do it right," he said. "And then in an appropriate time we should analyze what went wrong and why and what changes should be made."

Say what you want about his extra-marital affair, but at least Clinton didn't cut funding and staff to FEMA for three straight years in a row like the Chimperor has. Thanks Dubya!

Republic of T notes that Al Gore was helping hurricane victims evacuate from New Orleans and flying them to his home state of Tennessee. He kept these actions under the radar without any fanfare unlike Bush's Friday photo-ops.

Last but not least, I recommend reading or watching Keith Olbermann's hard-hitting editorial from yesterday evening:

Mr. Bush has now twice insisted that, "we are not satisfied," with the response to the manifold tragedies along the Gulf Coast. I wonder which "we" he thinks he's speaking for on this point. Perhaps it's the administration, although we still don't know where some of them are. Anybody seen the Vice President lately? The man whose message this time last year was, 'I'll Protect You, The Other Guy Will Let You Die'?  I don't know which 'we' Mr. Bush meant . . .

For him, it is a shame — in all senses of the word. A few changes of pronouns in there, and he might not have looked so much like a 21st Century Marie Antoinette. All that was needed was just a quick "I'm not satisfied with my government's response." Instead of hiding behind phrases like "no one could have foreseen," had he only remembered Winston Churchill's quote from the 1930's. "The responsibility," of government, Churchill told the British Parliament "for the public safety is absolute and requires no mandate. It is in fact, the prime object for which governments come into existence."

Countdown is probably the only MSM show I watch occasionally, simply because Olbermann is not a right-wing wacko talking head like the rest of the pundits on CNN, MSNBC, FOX, etc. Norm has the video and transcript here in case MSNBC decides to pull a Winston Smith and erase Olbermann's blog. There is video here also.

Got any interesting Katrina-related information? Send it along in the comments . . .

hurricane katrina katrina politics barbara bush bill clinton keith olbermann downing street memo