What Do We Have To Do ... Bitch-Slap Rupert Murdoch?
The New Yorker has made O'Reilly's list of "Media Operations that Traffic in Defamation™." We at Agitprop offer our heartiest congratulations.
But this raises a troubling issue ... what does Agitprop have to do to make O'Reilly's enemies list? We have mocked.O'Reilly.at.every.turn. We have run the picture you see two or three times. We regularly join in a chorus of "Jolly Old St. Falafel." Again and again we have posted on this steaming pile of dishonesty. But nothing.
So what to do? It is critical that Agitprop make the list if we are to bring our Rejectionist, Defeatist message to the wider world. So we ask you, our readership. What do we have to do to get on the damn list? Please help us. Our very viability is at stake.
tags: bill o'reilly fox news o'reilly enemies list rupert murdoch
photo by blogenfreude (taken in NYC's currently non-functioning subway). cross-posted at The Refugees
Blogenfreude, you will never make O'Reilly's list because he is afraid of you. He knows if he ever took you on, you would indeed verbally bitch-slap him back to his cave. BTW, there was a Best of Al Franken show on Air America yesterday that just took O'Reilly apart. I think you can still listen to it here (scroll down to Best of Al Franken and click on "Listen"). Even 12-year-old daughter was cracking up at Franken's riff on Bill O'Reilly, Astronaut.
Hope you aren't freezing up there!
Posted by: Kathy | December 21, 2005 at 07:55 AM
After I got on the radar of "Discover the Network" I retired from trying to get on the "enemies lists" of wingnuts.
Posted by: Roxanne | December 21, 2005 at 08:29 AM
I could get you on that list, but it would involve a shaped charge of C4 and a naked hooker...and maybe not the hooker.
Posted by: actor212 | December 21, 2005 at 09:36 AM
Awwww, I'm so disappointed that Falafel-Fest is ignoring you and your valiant attempts. I don't know if it will help but... if I were Billie-the-Skid, and I saw this blog, I'd definitely put you on the hate list. Does that help at all??
Hey! Maybe put up my grinch pic! That might help push him over the edge!
Posted by: HelenWheels | December 21, 2005 at 09:39 AM
Perhaps you are trying too hard. Take a Taoist approach, if you are passive, HE will come to you.
Posted by: comandante agi | December 21, 2005 at 09:43 AM
Call him gay. That's what really gets conservatives bent out of shape. Most of them are willing to comes to terms with the fact that they're full of shit. It's the really being gay part they can't cope with..
Posted by: Former Marine | December 21, 2005 at 10:03 AM
If it makes you feel any better, I'm sure that you're on the FBI's list.
Posted by: marie antoinette | December 21, 2005 at 10:49 AM
I like lists. Your not a somebody untill your on a list!Marie's right, I'm sure your or I could cover the spread when it came to NSACIAFBI, so don't take the O'Reilly thing to hard. You gotta just about have a velvet painting of O'Reilly sucking off Dear Leader while he hangs on the cross with the Eiffel Tower in the background to get on that list.In fact, didn't they find that type of subliminal stuff in those New Yorker cartoons? Like Disneys phalic sympols on the artwork for "The Little Mermaid?"
Posted by: Fred | December 21, 2005 at 11:26 AM
I agree with Agi...tell O'Loofah he's a raging homo with flames shooting so far outta his ass he singes anyone within 20 feet behind him!
And don't feel too bad, as we type, the United States goverment is "watching" us, & I'm sure your on the FBI' list, as well as the Department of Homeland Security's.
We should all take this opprotunity to welcome them.....here's my welcome.." Fuck off & go use our tax dollars to locate the REAL terrorists, bitches!"
Posted by: sappho | December 21, 2005 at 12:42 PM
...tell O'Loofah he's a raging homo with flames shooting so far outta his ass he singes anyone within 20 feet behind him!
At least part of that was a South Park episode ...
Posted by: blogenfreude | December 21, 2005 at 12:57 PM
Is an O'Reilly list worth making? Any O'Reilly list? I mean, it is O'Reilly, after all. It isn't like we're discussing someone...oh...normal or anything.
Posted by: DBK | December 21, 2005 at 01:52 PM
I take it you've tried sending liberal-email to the Factor.
Give him anything he can market and I'm sure you'll make his list in no time!
Posted by: qrswave | December 21, 2005 at 02:47 PM
I take it you've tried sending liberal-email to the Factor.
Links to our posts, demands that we be blacklisted, everything.
Posted by: blogenfreude | December 21, 2005 at 02:59 PM
It's obvious. Bait and switch, my brotha.
Send Bill this:
"I didn't know who else to turn to... One night me and Ward Churchill were talking about how Al Frankin had just drukenly confessed to killing Vince Foster, when Prof. Churchill leaned over and touch my weenie..."
Once your a guest on the Factor (and you know you will be because this is the kind of stuff he's crazy for), then start "smearing away." Start telling it like it is...make them drag you off the set. Before you can say "Does this tie make my face look blotchy?" you'll be on the list.
Posted by: Robot Buddha | December 21, 2005 at 03:28 PM
Aw, little Blogenfreude. Have faith. Your dreams will come true in time!
It's my Christmas wish for you that tomorrow O'Reilly wakes up from his long winter nap screaming, "AGITPROP!! AAAAAAHHHH!! MY EYES!! MY EYES!!" and he will rush outside rubbing handfuls of snow into his eyes to stop the burning.
Posted by: Thesaurus Rex | December 21, 2005 at 03:36 PM
It's simple, really. He's only adding major media outlets.
In two major feats of logic, he figured out that listing liberal blogs would give them more exposure -AND- that more exposure would be good for the liberal blogs.
I'm sure his brain hurt after that.
Posted by: Sagra | December 21, 2005 at 03:38 PM
Your dreams will come true in time!
T.Rex ... how can I thank you?! I wish you great joy during this Solstice season!
bf
Posted by: blogenfreude | December 21, 2005 at 03:45 PM
I hate to even post the obvious but, it is more than likely O'Reilly is afraid that like you would use this recognition as a badge of honour. (I would.) And the next thing he knows he'd be innundated with requests from other bloggers requesting to be added to his list.
Posted by: J Macdonald | December 21, 2005 at 03:53 PM
Blogen:
Light your candle, this night of Winter Solstice...and keep it lit. Perhaps o'Reilly will come to see the light.
Posted by: Night Bird | December 21, 2005 at 04:31 PM
i guess i seen too much cnn, but today they reported that enough c4 and caps was stolen from a demolition enterprise in abq to in fact blow up a bill-ding, maybe by terrorists. i was worried that they meant here, so i had the cops check the laundry room, but the president didn't call me back, though. i've been checking regular under the sink and my bike seat and told 'em i'd let 'em know if i saw something that wasn't right so they said ok and have a happy holiday and i said merry christmas to you, too, and they turned me into o'reilly and now what the fuck am i gonna do?
Posted by: rob miller | December 21, 2005 at 06:05 PM
Blogenfreude... the key to getting on that list is going to the local mall, kidnapping, at gunpoint, the overweight janitor dressed up as "Santa Claus", and then demanding that six children be skinned alive and then sacraficed to the pagan god of (insert "god" figure here - H.P. Lovecraft is always helpful in these situations), then throwing the bloody husks back at the parents and I mean, screeching —at the top of your lungs— "Your mothers suck cocks on CNN!!!"
Posted by: D. | December 21, 2005 at 11:51 PM
Know how you feel man. I've tried also. Emails begging to be on his list but all to no avail. Of course, I am one of the lucky ones. Living thousands of miles away so there is no possible way I can succumb to any wild desire I might have to actually listen to his bullshit. Keeps me from having to double my dose of blood pressure pills. Quite a saving there and us oldies have to watch the budget. Red wine prices keep going up!
Posted by: GRUMPY OLD MAN | December 22, 2005 at 12:42 AM
Red wine prices keep going up!
Isn't that the damn truth, grumpy old man! :) THAT is the true crime here.
Posted by: D. | December 22, 2005 at 12:52 AM
Hmm, it seems to me you have done all you can. I think you should be proud and not take his snubbing personally. He is probably ignoring millions of others who cannot stand him either. His list would cover half the world's population and it would be impossible to check it twice.
Posted by: karena | December 22, 2005 at 07:44 AM
I wonder if you were to ask him really nicely, or better still ask him what we have to do to get on his list. After all its not a very long list and would benefit with a few more names on it. That failing, suggest that he is showing undue favoritism with such an exclusive list.
Posted by: Davide Simonetti | December 22, 2005 at 09:08 AM
Order him some falafels from a Greek delivery place. Make sure the delivery person leaves your URL with the food.
Posted by: comandante agi | December 22, 2005 at 10:13 AM
Order him some falafels from a Greek delivery place. Make sure the delivery person leaves your URL with the food.
Brilliant ... better yet, I'll order from a kosher place. The WAR ON FALAFEL.
Posted by: blogenfreude | December 22, 2005 at 12:26 PM
I think you are going about it all wrong...you need to flirt with him , send you breathy emails...ones that vibrate with tension...then you will get his attention...( I mean that is what he likes ???right....)
Posted by: enigma4ever | December 22, 2005 at 12:27 PM
Mail him some agitprop stickers!
Posted by: comandante agi | December 22, 2005 at 12:38 PM