Agitprop: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Propaganda

Our Goddamn Overlords

The line-up:

POTUS: Bud Light
VPOTUS: Bucklers
Gates: Sam Adams Light
Crowley: Blue Moon

Shark-jumping^1,000,000, a fucking Bucklers?

You gotta balance the two boos with two honks for photo-ops, I understand, this can't be a fucking "teaching moment" where a guy who doesn't want to drink alcohol for personal reasons and/or be seen drinking alcohol for professional reasons can't have a fucking club soda?

The most powerful human in the world chose Bud Light?

Maybe spectacle wins, but I fucking sick of spectacle.

So How's All That Hope and Change Going??

Our first goal has got to be 100% Democratic appointees on the Supreme Court, unanimous control of the House and Senate, majority control of every state legislature, a majority lock on at least 2/3 of county council and executive seats nationwide, the mayoralties of all American cities with populations exceeding 50,000, and a congressional seat for the District of Columbia. Once accomplished, we can turn our eyes on the change we need.

- IOZ

Say it with me..."That's not change we can believe in"

Beergate

The most-anticipated beer of the Obama Administration is set to take place on Thursday at 6 p.m., a White House official told the Herald. On Friday, President Obama announced the peace draft to be shared with Cambridge police Sgt. James Crowley and Harvard Professor Henry Louis Gates Jr. to discuss the scholar’s controversial arrest on July 16.

Hey, what problems can't be resolved over a beer...unless you're in a Tennessee bar and the guy you are trying to reconcile with is carrying a concealed .45.

So, what's on the menu?

The beer selection for Thursday’s meeting is not known. Crowley prefers Blue Moon beer. Gates likes Beck’s and Red Stripe. The president drinks Budweiser.

The most powerful man in the world likes to drink...wait for it...Budweiser!?!

Well, at least he didn't say Pabst. The dude could have any beer he wants and he's going with the classic Amerikan swill. Damn, if I was president I'd turn the Lincoln Bedroom into a tap room featuring the finest West Coast IPAs, Belgian ales and German Oktoberfest brew imaginable.

I'm not the only one who thinks Obama should be more liberal and adventurous in the beer department. Here's a completely unscientific poll by NPR listeners. The verdict is near unanimous.

The president could always use this opportunity to solve both America' racial tensions and the standoff with North Korea by selecting Pyongyang's latest brew. There's nothing wrong with stress relief...

Found Poetry: Melee at the Cod Fish Races

Milbridge Days

it escalated into
a pushing contest
and just kind of
kept going

it blossomed again
on a side street

and in the middle
of the Cod Fish Races
it really got
a little out of hand


Yes, a drunken brawl and general disorder at the Milbridge Days’ Cod Fish Races Saturday. If you were wondering what cod fish races are:

The races are held in a baseball field on a 90-foot course. Each team consists of four people who must dress in four pieces of firemen’s gear and then run across the field clenching a greased, dead, 20-pound cod. About midtrack, firemen spray a stream of water from their hoses through the running codfish-wielding racers who try to dodge the dousing. [Bangor Daily News]

But it's not the regimented wackiness of cod fish racing; it's the disorderly break from civil Norms that festival is all about:

The ancient concepts of jubilee and saturnalia originate in an intuition that certain events lie outside the scope of "profane time," the measuring-rod of the State and of History. These holidays literally occupied gaps in the calendar--intercalary intervals. By the Middle Ages, nearly a third of the year was given over to holidays. Perhaps the riots against calendar reform had less to do with the "eleven lost days" than with a sense that imperial science was conspiring to close up these gaps in the calendar where the people's freedoms had accumulated--a coup d'etat, a mapping of the year, a seizure of time itself, turning the organic cosmos into a clockwork universe. The death of the festival. [Hakim Bey]

Punching someone in the face because one thinks they deserve it, may not be the most creative use of one's freedom, but fuck, it's more autonomy than I exercised this weekend. I'm such a tool, all I did was walk out the in door a couple times, and nervously set the cruise control at 9 mph over on the highway, (and even then, I reflexively touched the brakes when I saw a state trooper up ahead.)

Saturday Song

Lotsa stuff.

Glad to Know My Congressman Champions The Issues Important to Real Americans in the CA 48th

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart	Mon - Thurs 11p / 10c
The Born Identity
www.thedailyshow.com
Daily Show Full Episodes Political Humor Joke of the Day

Metaphor

On Meh.

Metaphor

A chumpy and overrated corporate whore goads his public into rebellion: the result?

While it is important that our fans remain free to voice their opinions, they must do so in an appropriate manner. We appreciate our players and fans' passion for the team and the game, but we all must aim to hold ourselves to higher standards. We have a very good relationship with the LA Riot Squad and have already reached out to them to set up a meeting to discuss moving forward together in a positive direction. In addition, the LA Riot Squad has informed us that they have issued a lifetime ban to the fan that went onto the field of play. We want to move in a positive direction as an organization, and ask our fans to support our players and our club as we look to return to the playoffs for the first time in three years."

Ideological State Apparatuses, beotches.

Sheeyit, nothing to do but laugh at Bongo's new home kit:

More stuff.

The Time is Now

I couldn't think of a better way to commemorate the Apollo 11 mission.

No Future

I'm a state employee...employed by one of California's community colleges and no, I am not a teacher (not enough money to make me even consider such a position). I work in student support services in a rather specialized sector. This past Tuesday I had a further breakthrough in an ongoing epiphany about my job and its expectations. It became quite apparent that it is not important that I accomplish anything, only that I appear to be doing something towards some sort of goal. How productive I am is not nearly as important as how productive I am perceived to be...while no one discusses this aloud, it is obvious from how we do business that this is our mission. I feel like I've arrived late to the party and inappropriately dressed.

We were having dinner with another couple this evening. He is recently retired from the Dept. of  Parole where he was a drug and alcohol counselor; she is a high school teacher. They've been listening to my tales of woe for years now and they laughed aloud when I told them of my recent realization. The teacher said she tells every class she teaches that it is not at all important that they listen to her, only that they appear to be listening to her. Appear to be attentive and don't be disruptive and we'll get through this all fine. Once the shock wore off, I was laughing my head off at her descriptions of her work.

So my new work persona involves being enthusiastic, motivated and sincere but all part of an illusion we maintain to make ourselves feel significant in what we do. So in order to be a more efficient worker, I need to be a better performer...go figure.

Burgerverse

HOLY SHIT! Think that's HOLY SHIT? Look what a Getafe player can do if he scores:

Globalization, beotches.       Unrelated bitching, moaning, music, links here.

God Bless The Spectacle

some reasoned Spectacle wrap-up here.

Your Future

Palin's as dumb as she appears to be or smart and acting stupid, and if the latter, ask yourself why and to whom and which is worse, that Team Republican didn't care she's too dumb to govern or thinks she's smart enough to rule but need seem stupid to be elected?

Alternatively, she's brilliant, savvy, like a con-man with new information delivery ahead of her time, a Roosevelt with a radio, a Palin with low-budget, easy-to-produce reality-shows all-the-time. Does anyone innately understand the expiration dates on ZOMG! daily outrages better?

Alternatively she's grifter sharp, knows she's been hit by luck's lightening, knows her money-making window's NOW! and wants to ca-ching, and which of us doesn't and wouldn't?

!hEh! Look who's on Fred Hiatt's op-ed page today!. Now she's in purple, now she's a turtle.

Sheeyit, mofos, thirty more years.

Snuff, links, songs.

Sunday (New) Sonic Youth

Palin, Fleabus, Ferals, links, poem, music, here.

Counterpoint.

Re: the below theory on President Obama's ass-fixation...

Single Look Theory

Much ado in the Blargosphere about this today. There are a lot of theories floating around as to the story behind this picture.
I called newly minted Democrat, and former Warren Commission staffer, Arlen Specter's office for a statement. Specter offers the most compelling explanation I have seen.

The Single Look Theory:

1. French President Nicolas Sarkozy looks at something,
2. causing President Obama to look down
3. at a white sneaker,
4. the nosing of a concrete stair,
5. a young delegate's hand,
6. and something else.

Brian Kilmeade: Open Mouth, Insert Bus

But it's alright as long as the members of these different species are from opposite genders...

via Gotcha Media

Crackbarry!

 

With audio! Other stuff here.

I'm only a bill, and I'm sitting here on Capitol Hill

Ladies and Gentleman, your 111th Congress:

Before a worldwide television audience, Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee of Houston took the stage at Michael Jackson's public memorial on Tuesday and showed her proposed House resolution that would honor the King of Pop in perpetuity - or as the congresswoman put it, "forever and forever and forever and forever and forever."...

Introduced on June 26, the day after Jackson's death, House Resolution 600 lists several charitable acts by the singer over his long career and proclaims him as an American legend, musical icon and world humanitarian.

Ok. Sheila Jackson Lee, you are an idiot. 

Of all the reasons in the world for spending legislative time you have chosen to publicly honor an entertainer - and possible pederast, dude.

Is it because Michael Jackson could not achieve sainthood without the official recognition of the glorious, holy writ of law? Must the self-proclaimed "King of Pop" be enshrined in the state religion that is U.S. Law?

But they won't stop there...these high priests of the U.S. Constitution also want to take on the dreaded NCAA, too!

Hatch has made it clear that he’s no fan of the current system, suggesting that it violates federal antitrust provisions designed to prevent anti-competitive business practices.

"I've said before that I don't believe a plainer description of the BCS exists," said Hatch, who was one of the only senators to endure the full hearing. Sens. Herb Kohl (D-Wisc.) and Chuck Schumer (D-N.Y.) made brief appearances.

Although the issue might strike some as a frivolous congressional pursuit, Hatch also chaired a 2003 meeting on the topic. In addition, President Barack Obama has also chimed in, saying that he prefers a playoff system over the current BCS system.

See...they love those NCAA players so much that they want to force them to play extra games in order to sell beer and talking baby ads to the television networks.

If Congress is going to engage in these tactics then I firmly believe that the great Billy Mays deserves a resolution proclaiming him the greatest infomercial spokesman who ever lived forever and ever and ever in this universe of ours.

I mean, it's only fair. 

But wait, there's more!

Snortle

Via.

The fate of my ferals, Fleabus video, lotsa music, here.

Michael Jackson: Still Dead

When Rick Sanchez isn't posting banal tweets about his birthday or chowing down with his family he is providing careful insight into the story selection process of cable network news.

Man, I really hope this Twitter thing is just a fad - but considering that Sarah Palin is going to launch a national campaign for relevancy via 140-character statements, I think we are going to see a lot more from this ugly social networking tool. 

Saturday Song, Or: Pay No Attention to What the girls or chryon say, though it's an apt metaphor for something

My feral cats, Palin's resignation, more.

This Country of Ours

Here's wishing everyone a happy, patriotic weekend.

There's a bonus song after the jump.

Waltz Manifesto

Chris Hedges:

The ability of the corporate state to pacify the country by extending credit and providing cheap manufactured goods to the masses is gone. The pernicious idea that democracy lies in the choice between competing brands and the freedom to accumulate vast sums of personal wealth at the expense of others has collapsed. The conflation of freedom with the free market has been exposed as a sham.

Sarah Palin:

Oh, thank God, it's nonpartisan. It doesn't matter your background, your demographics, your race, your political affiliation—it's such a uniting, healthy, fun, awesome activity. It cracks me up going to some running event and seeing some dude who campaigned so hard against me, or a lady who's been blogging some mean comments about me. But we're all there together and we're smiling and we're having a good time because we're going to do something healthy and active. We need more of that. That's what sports are able to do. It's a wonderful kind of diversion from the divisiveness that is politics or that is life. And my parents, they've got so many friends from so many different political bents because of all their years participating in races and organizing races. I was lucky enough to have been brought up in that atmosphere where I see the value in that.

My friend Dr Z enticing me to disc golf tomorrow:

You could meet Sally, my genetically similar unit. She's genetically similar to you, but not so much, so you will only like her a little, or you will have ambivalent feelings toward her.

I vote option three. More.

What the fuck does Osama Bin Laden have to do with anything?! What the fuck are you talking about?!

Remember Ward Churchill? The marginalized and discredited college professor, who when asked what it would take to motivate people to stand up in protest of the Iraq war, replied:

I don’t have a ready answer for that. One of the things I’ve suggested is that it may be that more 9/11s are necessary.

The FOX News analog for marginalized and discredited college professor Ward Churchill, is former CIA Bin Laden Chief Michael Scheuer, who when asked what it will take to motivate people to stand up in protest of illegal immigration, replied:

The only chance we have as a country right now is for Osama bin Laden to deploy and detonate a major weapon in the United States.

The pwogs are beside themselves. This fellow dares us to, "Imagine what would happen if someone on the left had said this." Ward Churchill would prolly tell ya.