Agitprop: Or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Propaganda

People Get Ready

jaw dropping

Bachmann Introducing Bill to Ban Use of Made-Up Global Currency.

That is all.

Snakehandler of the Day

Another day, another compassionate conservative:

MARCH 16–A Florida man wearing an “I ♥ My Marriage” t-shirt was arrested last night for allegedly choking his wife during an argument in their Tampa-area home. Bradley Gellert, a 32-year-old financial consultant, was busted by Hillsborough County Sheriff’s Office deputies and booked into jail on a felony domestic battery by strangulation charge.

Would have been funny if Joe the Plumber had been wearing a McCain t-shirt when he beat up the missus.

Today in Snakehandling

Because someone has to keep an eye on the Bible thumpers:

Georgia Woman Runs Over Boyfriend for Not Going to Church 

Baltimore Father Stabs Son After Teen Refuses to Remove Hat in Church

Bobby Jindal Casts Out Chances For Higher Office

Faith Based Terror Fightin'

Two days ago I suggested that, should the South decide again to secede, we should let them go. Somewhere, some commenter wrote that we should retain this or that piece of Kentucky in our more perfect Union because it had bourbon or bluegrass or something.  And again I say, fuck no:

As an atheist and a Kentuckian, Edwin Hensley was rather put off to learn that the God he has spent decades not believing [in] had been put in charge of keeping the Bluegrass State safe from terrorism.

Turns out a stealthy legislative move by a Baptist preacher-turned-politician led to the passage of a 2006 bill requiring the state’s Office of Homeland Security to acknowledge formally that safety and security in the state “cannot be achieved apart from reliance upon almighty God.” The language in the bill only recently came to the public’s attention, leading Hensley and some like-minded Kentuckians to file a lawsuit against the state.

Quick, somebody call Chertoff and tell him Kentucky doesn’t need any more Homeland Security money.

How Would Jesus Drive?

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you the average Palin supporter:

A speeding truck rammed a woman’s sedan at over 100 MPH on a Texas freeway last Friday. Why? According to the Archangel Gabriel/ Michael E. Schwab, a resident of Blooming Grove, Texas, the woman “was not driving like a Christian.”

What - she wasn’t signaling in tongues?

Channeling My Inner Carlin

Lot's of severe weather shit happening out there - tornadoes, floods, brush fires started by lightning.  Here's what I want to know - does it make me a bad person to hope that the only people flooded out are two-time Bush voters? That the flood waters know where to go and whose house to flood? 

Does it  make me a bad person to hope that those houses going up in flames from brush fires are owned by Bush Pioneers and other assorted Republican scum? What do you think?

Do you suppose any of these GOP cocksuckers think that eight years of Al Gore might have made a difference as they see grandma floating by in her rocker?  Do you think they sense that global warming might just be real as they watch their dog Fluffy drift away on a piece of styrofoam to become 'gator food? Do any of these selfish fucks think that "conservatism" might not be such a hot idea as they dig through what's left of their house to find all the stupid shit they bought at WalMart?

Bobby Jindal Wants Your Balls

If you need more support for my idea that atheism (or a really serious fucking agnosticism) be a requirement for holding public office, here it is:

Rising Republican star Bobby Jindal signed legislation allowing judges to force convicted rapists to undergo chemical castration, the Louisiana Advocate reports:

“I am glad we have taken such strong measures in Louisiana to put a stop to these monsters’ brutal acts,” the governor said in a prepared statement.Jindal signed Senate Bill 144 into law on the day that the U.S. Supreme Court ruled Louisiana cannot execute people who rape children under the age of 12.

The governor blasted the high court’s decision.